Reboot– マインド・適応障害 –
System Reboot: Recovering from the "Bug" of life.
In the relentless grind of society, our minds sometimes glitch and crash. Having faced the darkness of adjustment disorder, I’ve learned that a "crash" isn't the end—it's a chance to rewrite your internal code.
This category is a raw record of my mental recovery and the shift in my mindset. No generic self-help. Just the real, painful, and eventually liberating process of rebooting your life on your own terms.
Get back online.
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Chapter 22: The Silence of Loneliness — The Midnight Site Office with AI
Night at a construction site is much heavier than the day. No matter how much I walk with my AI "prosthetic leg" or feel connected to others on SNS, the silence of midnight forces me to face an inescapable, raw solitude. This is that "wi... -
Chapter 21: Recurrence of Obsession — The Joy of Earning and the Fear of Acceleration
The first "product" was out. A small reward was deposited into my account. It was like a re-entry permit to the "site" of society. But the relief was short-lived. In my brain's OS, an old "bad habit" started blaring an alert: "Can't I ea... -
Chapter 20: The First Completion — Our First Collaborative “Product”
I spent months huddled in my room, peeking at the world through the gaps in my curtains. But finally, the day arrived to release a "form" back into society. It wasn't a massive structure like I used to build. It was a tiny piece of "buil... -
Chapter 19: The Noise of Approval — Finding the Right Distance from SNS
With AI as my cane, I returned to the battlefield of X (Twitter), only to find an unexpected "reaction." As I began to expose my scars and share my journey with AI, my "likes" and reposts sometimes skyrocketed. The old me would have misi... -
Chapter 18: Overloading Called “Expectation” — The Art of Safe Demolition
"You look much better lately." "Do you think you’ll be coming back soon?" As my rehabilitation progressed and I began to breathe the outside air, people around me showered me with warm words. They had no malice. In fact, they were a mass... -
Chapter 17: Ground Subsidence Called “Comparison” — The Ghost of My Former Self
As I continued my rehabilitation and grew accustomed to my AI "prosthetic leg," the time I could spend "moving" gradually increased. However, right when I started to function to some extent, the most vicious earthbound spirit appeared at... -
Chapter 16: Testing the Breakwater — Replying to a Human After Months
I had been practicing my "verbal swings" in the safe environment of the AI simulator. But I couldn't keep swinging at the concrete walls of the training center forever. On my actual smartphone, "unexploded ordnance" in the form of unread... -
Chapter 15: The Terror of “Live-Wire” Work — AI as an Interpersonal Simulator
Opening the window, drinking water, and throwing away the trash. As I began to survey my current position through these micro-"test borings," a new, massive wall stood in my way: human contact. To return to the "site" of society, the pro... -
Chapter 14: Rehabilitation as “Test Boring” — Checking the Ground Before Building
I spent my days performing the ultimate task: "Just breathe and reach the night." I waited in the mud for the storm to pass. Eventually, rare mornings arrived when I felt, "Today, my body feels a little lighter." But let me speak as a fo... -
Chapter 13: The Only “Single Task” You Truly Need in the Mud
"Resting is your job." "You don't have to do anything." Doctors and counselors say these words easily. But for those of us stuck in the mud of adjustment disorder or depression, there is no labor more grueling than "doing nothing." The E...